Tim Stanley
Only Nixon could go to China and only Keir Starmer could give a speech to Tony Blair’s Future of Britain Conference, a centrist dadathon held to discuss the future of tomorrow, today. Keir joined a chorus of sparkly think-leaders with preposterous names – Poppy Gustafsson, Sims Wetherspoon, Mete Coban – plus no-nonsense business dragon Deborah Meaden and cheeky chef Jamie Oliver (Sue Cook pulled out).
There was even a fawning interview with Henry Kissinger – accompanied by images of his meeting with Mao – who reassured us that we have nothing to fear from the Chinese Communist Party. As Confucius said: “Pull other one. Has bells on.” Had Jeremy Corbyn been invited to this conference, he’d have glued his hands to the floor in protest – but that’s the point. Corbyn was a socialist; Keir is desperate to prove he’s anything but. So while he outrages his backbenchers by signing up to the Government’s Two Child welfare policy, he also pays tribute at the court of Blair, signalling that if you vote Labour, you’ll get New Labour back. “It’s impossible to list the challenges” we face, he said, for “we’d be here all day”. Then he listed them. The audience slipped into a gentle coma, ’till Tony walked on stage for a chat – his presence so electric it was almost supernatural. With mad eyes, white hair and alarming teeth, Blair at 70 looks as if he has been raised from his tomb after a bunch of teenagers, sheltering from a storm, found an ancient book beneath a floorboard and read from it backwards. “How are you enjoying prime minister’s questions?” asked the Crypt Keeper. “I’m a bit out of practice,” Keir joked (Sunak keeps avoiding them). “That’s something I really don’t miss,” said Tony, his cold eyes glazing over at the memory of power. Wherever he is in the world, at “midday, Wednesday, I get this uneasy feeling…”.
He told Starmer that he’d done well to turn Labour around since 2019, that his task was even greater than in 1997. “I was lucky enough to have Neil Kinnock and John Smith before me. You weren’t.” Keir and the audience enjoyed that pop at Corbyn, but it could also have been a dig at Gordon Brown and Ed Miliband. Tories go into government assuming they were born to rule, observed Tony; the Left, not so much. He’s correct. Social democrats like Keir feel an overwhelming need to prove they can be every bit as hard as Conservatives; hence, they’ll endorse welfare cuts and military adventures. Much of politics is elites flirting. Opposites attract. When Nixon met Mao, Mao said he had voted for him. Of course, no one ever voted for Mao… Chairman Blair left Starmer with his blessing, and it couldn’t hurt. The master of the dark arts is as compelling as ever, statesmanlike yet personal, witty and insightful. He remains a man millions would be willing to follow into battle, which is fortunate because old Tony always did love a war.
The Telegraph
